Asked by Anonymous
My short answer is go somewhere else.
If you were young and it’s only been two years, chances are you are still young. And if you let him go now you’ll have more than enough time. That’s something you shouldn’t worry about. Life is short. You don’t need him to keep on living it. And if you BOTH still feel strongly about each other once you’ve both gone off and done your own thing(s), cool. If not, cool. Life goes on. The most important thing is that you own and enjoy your own on your own terms.
Having said that… There are a few options you have based on how YOU feel.
If deserve better means you went into this relationship with the expectation that you would commit to him only (very reasonable and fully expected), and him to you in return (and he was serious about what he said), then just leave and live your life. Based on what you’ve said, I’m guessing that’s the best option for you. As it is for most people.
If he piqued your curiosity about your options there are more liberal minded approaches to consider. If your relationship is of the rare breed that can enthusiastically and consensually thrive in risqué behavior, there are also swinger and sex club scenes. From what I’ve read, most require that any man is accompanied by a woman. You as two consenting adults can go together knowing what each are are doing as you are doing it. But that’s only if that’s what YOU really want.
What I wouldn’t suggest is turning a two year relationship into something where you are only committed to him and he can dip into whatever else he likes whenever else he likes. Apparently that sort of thing has worked once in a blue moon (see Megan Fox’s half-open marriage and the very rare happy equally open relationship), but given your response I don’t think that’s the kind of thing you want at all.
If that’s what he wants, and you don’t, and he’s set on pursuing that, he isn’t your boyfriend anymore. If YOU don’t WANT to talk to him anymore, don’t. If you see a friend you no longer want any kind of romantic or physical relationship with, then do as you feel. If you see someone you might want sex from every once in a while, then do what you want. The point is do what makes YOU feel comfortable and happy. But do not compromise and confuse his suggested future situation with a committed relationship.